If He’s Not Doing These Things When You’re Dating, He Won’t Do Them When He’s Your BF

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Things definitely change when you make that move to become “official.” You become much more involved in each other’s lives, meet each other’s families, and start being gross together. But if you’re hoping that getting into a relationship with him will change the following things, think again.

1. HE WON’T BECOME MORE ROMANTIC.Sorry, but if he’s not pulling out the stops now, he surely isn’t going to once he’s already got you. That said, this might be something you want to double check your own expectations on. Sweeping romantic gestures are for the movies, not real life. However, he should be able to muster a little extra TLC sometimes.

2. HE WON’T BECOME SUPER FIT.While it’s reasonable to be annoyed when a long-term partner lets himself go, it’s not reasonable to expect a prospective partner to change his body for you. If he’s out of shape and asks for your help, then great! Even so, don’t let your feelings for him be contingent on whether he accomplishes this. Don’t go into a relationship unsure of whether you can be attracted to him.

3. HE WON’T SUDDENLY BECOME MORE MATURE.If he’s irresponsible now, dating you isn’t going to change that. Nagging will only make him defensive. If anything, he’ll become dependent on you to fix his mistakes and you’ll take on the mom role.

4. HIS BAGGAGE WON’T GO AWAY.Do you suspect he isn’t quite over his ex? You might think that him starting a relationship with you will force him to move on. Wrong! There’s always going to be a third person in that relationship. This is also true for personal hang-ups and traumas. If his baggage is a problem now, it will be a problem in the future.

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